At the beginning of the month our nights usually consisted of a bath, a bottle and a swaddle all back to back. We would rock Asher after the bottle and swaddle and hope that when we put him down he would drift off. The bottle, swaddle and rocking took about an hour. Once we put him down in the crib he would either immediately start to scream or sleep for an hour and then wake up crying. We would calm him down and try to get him back to sleep and then after another hour or so...ultimately put him in the swing (in his bedroom) and he would sleep till 5-6 in the morning, eat, and go right back to sleep until 9-10.
A couple of weeks into the month Asher started to wake up around 2-3 for an additional feeding. After a week of this I couldn't take it any more. Bedtime was a taking 2 hours and I was sleeping in 3 hour increments and feeling very sleep deprived. Cathy helped us to figure out that Asher was still hungry and that my milk was probably not the same since I started back at work. My supply started to decrease since I went back to work and I have been getting less sleep, more stressed, not eating as healthy, so overall my milk was not as "good" or as filling as it was. I started taking fenugreek and pumping a little bit more to get my supply back up, but until then we were going to try and top him off at night with a little formula. This was a hard decision for me to make because I didn't want I give him formula. I realized that it is more important for him to be fat and happy and sleeping well, and that if a couple of ounces of formula at night time can make a difference it was worth a shot. Of course it made a difference and that 2-3 o'clock feeding went away.
Solved one problem but, we still have the problem of him crying when we put him down at bedtime and ending up in the swing. Everyone kept telling us that we need to let him cry it out, but it just seemed so harsh to me. I felt like if he wants to be rocked to sleep and snuggled why would I not do that...the day is going to come when he will not want to be rocked to sleep anymore and will miss these days. After a couple more nights of the same behavior...I started feeling guilty for putting him in the swing and knew that we were just creating another bad habit that would have to be broken. I called the pediatricians office and talked with the nurse and we determined that his nighttime habits were behavioral and would need to be broken, and the sooner we do it the easier it will be. She too suggested cry it out. I still was so apprehensive, then the night I went to the consignment sale Nick had to put the baby to bed and ultimately started night 1 of cry it out.
I didnt know that Nick was going to do this. Nick said that after 10 minutes of crying the baby was asleep in swing, and stayed asleep until 6am. Night one complete.
Since the baby had been sleeping in the swing for the last couple of weeks we thought it would be too harsh to make him cry it out in the crib, so we figured we would start with the swing and then transition to the crib.
Night two was great, rocked the baby put him in the swing drowsy but still awake and not a peep. He slept through till 5 or 6 the next morning. We decided that we would move him into the crib on night three.
We had to do our own variation of cry it out, one that I was comfortable with. The plan was to put him in the crib drowsy after his bottle. When he first started to fuss we would go give him the pacifier, after that if he started to cry we had to wait 10 minutes. After 10 minutes we go and give him the pacifier, pat him and calm him down no more than 2 to 3 minutes. If he started to cry again we would wait 15 minutes before going into his room. Our plan was to increase the length of time between each visit to his room.
The first night wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. He cried for 10 minutes (I was in the bath with the water running so I didn't have to hear him), after ten minutes I went into his room, and calmed him down. Shortly after I left his room he started to cry again, and cried for another 8 minutes and then passed out. The next night in the crib he cried for 10 minutes, I calmed him down, he cried for another eight and passed out again. Then the third night in the crib we put him down and no crying at all! It's pretty much been like this for the last week. Some nights he cries, some nights he doesn't, but there has only been one night that he has ever cried longer than 20 minutes.
Through out this entire process, we also adjusted his daytime schedule so now his has his last feeding is between 8:30 and 9. We also have bath time around 7:30 then put Asher in his pjs (he now sleeps in the longsleeve footed PJ's) and let him hang with us until it's time to bed. Not having the bath immediately before bed has been great and seems to give us more family time. We also do not swaddle him in the swaddle blankets anymore, but instead use the light weight muslin blankets and swaddle him with his arms out.
Since bedtime no longer takes 2+ hours, Asher is usually asleep by 930, which means he is ready to eat again around 3-4. But then straight back to bed and he will sleep till about 8:30.
He still cries sometimes at bedtime but it is getting much better and 10-20 minutes of crying, although heartbreaking, definitely beats 2 hours of in and out if his room at bedtime, and means more sleep for everyone!
I am hoping that at his four month checkup, the doctor will say we can start rice cereal which hopefully will allow me to stop feeding him formula, and hopefully the rice cereal will be enough to keep him satisfied till a 6am feeding, then go back to sleep until 9am.
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